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CartMarika Devan2020-07-05T20:43:10-07:00

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[𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐗𝐈] 𝐌𝐲 𝐚𝐦𝐚𝐳𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝟖𝟎-𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐫-𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐟𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐧 𝐦𝐲 𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐩𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐩 𝐭𝐨 𝐂𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐥 𝐀𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐚. ⁣
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He offered to finish the trip with me, which meant I would go to Guatemala City to meet him, and then we would go to Antigua, take a shuttle to Lanquin and finally end up in Cancun where I am supposed to fly out with the Australian guys. ⁣
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I thought my mom was crazy for sending my grandfather. We have only traveled to Åland together (where he is from), which is a small island between Finland and Sweden. I love my grandpa, but I was not prepared for this. I mean, I was staying in hostels for goodness sake.⁣
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But it would be an adventure, AND I got to stay in hotels which were a nice change from the chaoticness of hostel life. ⁣
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With my grandfather added to the picture, I knew my trip would be a lot different, but after my sketchy cab ride, I was okay with that. I love my grandpa (I call him morfar meaning mother's father in Swedish), and a part of me was happy he was going to be with me. My mom could finally sleep at night, knowing I was with him.⁣
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[𝐓𝐎 𝐁𝐄 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐔𝐄𝐃]⁣

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[𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐗] 𝐈 𝐠𝐨𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐛 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐲 𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐰𝐨 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐠𝐮𝐲𝐬 𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐛 𝐝𝐫𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫. ⁣
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I was freaking out and was definitely more sober than I was when I left the club. I hesitantly told the driver where I wanted to go which just happened to be a 3 minute cab ride, but I was too freaked out to walk the rest of the way. ⁣
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Thankfully I got dropped off in front of my hostel, but that cab ride shook me. It could have gone in a completely different direction. I was just happy to be back in my room, safe and sound. The next day I called my mom still freaking out about the whole situation.⁣
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She was worried about me and wanted me to come home. I told her I was fine and then she did something that surprised me...She offered to fly my brother out to do the rest of the trip with me. My brother was working so couldn’t fly out. I kept assuring her I would be fine. ⁣
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She ended up flying someone out to travel the rest of the time with me. It wasn’t her or my brother, but someone I least expected.⁣
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[𝐓𝐎 𝐁𝐄 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐔𝐄𝐃]⁣

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[𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐈𝐗] 𝐎𝐧𝐞 𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐚𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐥 𝐢𝐧 𝐀𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐠𝐮𝐚, 𝐈 𝐦𝐞𝐭 𝐚 𝐆𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐬𝐭𝐮𝐝𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐒𝐩𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐬𝐡. ⁣
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We hit It off and ended up spending the majority of my time in Antigua together. One night she tells me she has friends in Guatemala city that are coming to Antigua for a night. ⁣
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I haven't had a proper night out, so I was excited to experience Antigua's nightlife. We met up with her friends at a club. I got pretty drunk and ended up losing my friend in the crowd. I looked everywhere! Feeling defeated, I started walking back to the hostel. ⁣
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There were no cabs in sight, and it was about 2 am, so I was a bit nervous to walk back alone, but I had no choice, and it was only a 15-minute walk, which wasn't too bad. As I was walking, I noticed how quiet it was. If someone came up to me with a knife or attacked me, I would be screwed. I started getting scared. In the distance, I saw an open convenience store and went inside. ⁣
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With my broken Spanish, I asked if they could call me a cab. They were incredibly friendly and allowed me to sit inside while I waited. I bought something to show my appreciation. Five minutes later, a taxi pulled up in front. I noticed the cab's windows were all tinted. That was strange. Cabs don't usually have tinted windows.⁣
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I didn't think much of it and got in, but that's the point when I started freaking out...⁣
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[𝐓𝐎 𝐁𝐄 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐔𝐄𝐃]⁣

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[𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐕𝐈𝐈𝐈] 𝐀𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐩𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝟏𝟓 𝐦𝐢𝐧 𝐈 𝐬𝐚𝐰 𝐚 𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐮𝐩 𝐚 𝐬𝐢𝐠𝐧 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐦𝐲 𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞 𝐨𝐧 𝐢𝐭. 𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐬𝐨 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐝.⁣
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It was about 1 am when I arrived in the gorgeous cobblestoned town of Antigua, Guatemala. Without boring you with too many details, Antigua was fantastic! My first day there I walked around and discovered how much I enjoyed solo travel. I could do what I wanted when I wanted without compromising with anyone. What was I worried about?⁣
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Now, it’s worth mentioning that right before this trip, I was newly diagnosed with Ataxia, so a lot of the things I struggled with were because of my condition. ⁣
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For example, the guys were incredibly active and wanted to do a bunch of intense hikes. I couldn’t do those so we separated during those times. I also struggled with the heat so I spent time sleeping during the few hours when it was hot. ⁣
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My condition makes it really difficult to travel with people. Luckily, I love solo travel and this trip was the beginning of all the amazing solo trips I would have! ⁣
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[𝐓𝐎 𝐁𝐄 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐔𝐄𝐃]⁣
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#girlslovetravel #gltlove #iamtb #travelbloggeres #goexplore #thetravelwomen #colouryourlife #everydayofmaychallenge #darlingescapes #destinationchaser #traveltagged #globelletravels #wearetravelgirls #solotravel #solotravelgirl #womenwhotravel #femmetravel #womenwhoexplore #backpackwithme #nowdiscovering #ataxia #disabilityblogger #backpackersintheworld #backpackerstory #travellust #traveladdiction #roamtheworld #travelforever #wonderfulglobe #travelblogger⁣

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𝐓𝐨𝐝𝐚𝐲, 𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐲 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲 (𝐈 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠!)⁣
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I wanted to check in and see how you guys are doing. I have been cooking loads of interesting recipes, learning to play guitar, getting lots of work done, and having virtual wine nights with my friends. ⁣
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Remember, amidst all this chaos, take time for yourself. Whatever that means for you. Read a book, bake some banana bread, learn a tik tok dance. Whatever you need to do to ‘treat yo self’ or just have a day doing the things you enjoy. ⁣
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Also, I am so close to seeing if I can buy yeast on the black market. ⁣
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#girlslovetravel #gltlove #iamtb #travelbloggeres #goexplore #thetravelwomen #colouryourlife #everydayofmaychallenge #darlingescapes #destinationchaser #traveltagged #globelletravels #wearetravelgirls #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #womenwhotravel #femmetravel #womenwhoexplore #backpackwithme #nowdiscovering #ataxia #disabilityblogger #backpackersintheworld #backpackerstory #travellust #traveladdiction #roamtheworld #travelforever #wonderfulglobe #travelblogger⁣

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[𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐕𝐈𝐈] 𝐍𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐠𝐮𝐚 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐈 𝐟𝐞𝐥𝐭 𝐝𝐞𝐟𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝. 𝐈 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐝 𝐦𝐲 𝐦𝐨𝐦 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐈 𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬.⁣
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She asked if I wanted to come home and I was thinking about it, but I said no. I would just continue on the trip with them. ⁣
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Our first night, we met some people at our hostel and started drinking a lot. I got really emotional and found a stray dog that I started talking to and crying. I was a freaking mess! It was clear I needed to go my own way and let the boys go theirs. ⁣
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I called my mom the next morning and told her I wanted to leave, but I didn't want to go home. I wanted to go to Guatemala. ALONE?!?! My mom was freaking out. My brother was my saving grace because he spent a few weeks in Guatemala a couple of years before and convinced my mom to let me go.⁣
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I told the guys I was leaving, and they didn't seem surprised. They could tell I was miserable. I planned to leave early in the morning. This was going to be my first taste of solo travel. I was going to take the bus to the airport, but my hostel told me the bus station was very dangerous and I had to take a cab to the airport. ⁣
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They planned a cab pickup for me, and the next day I was off! I was alone for the first time in 2 weeks and couldn't wait to get to Antigua, my next destination! I arrived at Guatemala city airport pretty late. I booked a transfer through my hostel, but when I got outside, I couldn't find him anywhere.⁣
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I panicked. There were so many people, and one guy came up to me and told me to be very careful because this airport is dangerous. I called my mom crying. I didn't know what to do, and I was scared. I wasn't allowed back inside the airport for some reason, and no one spoke English. This was the first time ever where I was genuinely scared for my life.
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[𝐓𝐎 𝐁𝐄 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐔𝐄𝐃]⁣

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[𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐕𝐈] 𝐋𝐞𝐭 𝐦𝐞 𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐛𝐲 𝐬𝐚𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐈 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐂𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐚 𝐑𝐢𝐜𝐚! ⁣
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I wish I would have had more time there, but I won’t bore you with all the details of my time there. Instead, I will fast forward to our last day. ⁣
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Like the rest of my time on the trip, I ended up doing most things alone. On my last day, I decided to visit a spa that is popular in the part of Costa Rica I was visiting. I got a reasonably priced pass and was excited. It’s been a while since I have gone to a spa.⁣
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I was feeling great after my day that nothing could ruin it! Except...maybe getting back to my hostel and realizing my friends weren’t at the hostel anymore. All their things were moved out of the room, and their beds were occupied by other people. ⁣
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I figured they might have changed rooms so I went to look for them, but couldn’t find them. I started to panic. Did they leave without me? I have no idea how to get to Nicaragua (our next stop) I broke down and started crying. I wanted to go home.⁣
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Then, one of the hostel workers came up to me and said that my friends didn’t pay for their night, and the hostel booked up, so they are staying at a hotel 2 min away. ⁣
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WHY DIDN’T THEY TELL ME? Was I just supposed to panic all night? Were they ever going to come and get me?⁣
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I thanked him and found the hotel they were staying at. My patience with them was getting thinner and thinner. My anxiety was getting worse and worse. I needed to do something. I couldn’t continue on this trip. ⁣
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In Nicaragua, I made a decision that I never thought I would make in a million years. I have reached my last nerve, and I couldn’t go on like this.⁣
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[𝐓𝐎 𝐁𝐄 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐔𝐄𝐃]⁣

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[𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐕] 𝐆𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐁𝐨𝐜𝐚𝐬 𝐃𝐞𝐥 𝐓𝐨𝐫𝐨 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐞𝐫 𝐬𝐚𝐢𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐝𝐨𝐧𝐞. We booked an overnight bus and were suppose to arrive the next morning. But at 4 am, our bus pulled over. It broke down, and we would have to wait for another bus coming from Panama City to pick us up. We were about 2 hours away, so we prepared for a loooooooooong night.⁣⁣
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At about 6 am a small janky minivan came to pick us up. I only had about 3 hours of sleep, so to say I was cranky was an understatement. We rode for 3 hours to the boat dock, where we would board our boat to Bocas Del Toro. I was so pumped to finally get my bikini out and go swimming in the crystal clear waters. ⁣⁣
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Things were continuing to get weirder between us. We arrived at our hotel, and I decided to explore on my own and to meet them later for dinner. ⁣⁣
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“Why did I agree to come on this trip with these guys?” I should have been having a great time, but it was hard when the two people I am traveling with seem to not want anything to do with me.⁣⁣
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I ended up booking a full-day tour to a couple of beaches. I didn’t want to spend my time hanging with them if I didn’t have to. ⁣⁣
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The tour ended up being incredible! And I had the freshest fish I think I have ever had in my life (they caught it that day.) Getting back to my hotel was awkward. It was like we both wanted to say something, but neither of us had the guts to. It went on like this the entire time in Bocas Del Toro. The next stop was Costa Rica, and that is where everything changed. Costa Rica was my breaking point. ⁣⁣
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[𝐓𝐎 𝐁𝐄 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐔𝐄𝐃]⁣⁣

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